Internet wants to rule!

While software rules our computers today, the Internet is trying to take over the #1 spot.

Internet Rules

  1. The Internet is infested by acronym freaks. This rule will be known as TIIIBAF in the future.
  2. Levels of Internet stupidity in order of increasing magnitude are:
    1. Arguing with someone on the Internet.
    2. Believing someone will take you seriously if you argue.
    3. Swearing, calling names or insulting someone.
    4. Swearing, calling names or insulting someone and believing you are not an idiot.
    5. Believing that freedom is doing anything you want.
  3. Lack of self control, restraint and concern for others will lead to chaos.
  4. Chaos will be brought under control by laws, rules and regulation. Government projects are exempted from chaos controls.
  5. Most Internet users make horrible economists. Internet users believe there is a free lunch.
  6. All Internet software and interfaces will become standardized 1 year after the Internet is obsoleted by something else.
  7. Keeping the Internet from being grid locked over the next 10 years may be a greater feat than putting the first man on the moon. (Story)
  8. The Internet is like "The Goose that Laid Golden Eggs". The problem is there are vendors and users with hatchets.
  9. The Internet is like a Lan. (See Hardware rules #14-15 )
  10. Any advanced society will classify SPAMMING as a 1st degree felony. They will also outlaw any replies to a SPAM.
  11. Pretty Good Privacy, PGP, is good enough. Be secure in the fact that it may take a few months or even a year or two before someone tears PGP apart.
  12. Volume of data should not be confused with useful data. Remember an infinite number of monkeys typing will generate an unfathomable amount of trash.
  13. No one can completely understand how things move on the Internet. Chaos was one of the original design specs.
  14. The internet may give an intelligent, hard working person the freedom to communicate with thousands, millions or even billions.
  15. The internet may give an inconsiderate, hard working fool the ability to insult and abuse the freedom of thousands, millions or even billions.
  16. The best way to end the chaos generated by spammers and fools is to ignore them. Unfortunately it only takes one reply to keep their little egos satisfied and their fingers typing.
  17. One of the great satisfactions of the Internet is being able to empty the trash and not add to a land-fill.
  18. There is a difference between private and public information.  The problem is many unethical businesses don't know what the difference is.
  19. If what you say on the Internet is different than what you would say to some one face to face, you may have a problem with honesty and/or courtesy.
  20. Internet speed is the inverse of your need to open the web page.
Email vs. snail mail an analysis and why SPAM is bad. (For those that need help thinking it through)
When mass marketers want to send 1 million letters on snail mail, they must pay a fee for every letter.  The cost for advertising is their responsibility.  This fee supports the infrastructure of the snail mail system and limits the amount of junk mail in the system.  If mass marketers ever attempted to send snail mail with 'postage due', they would be laughed out of the market and make any thing they advertised a  hated product.

With Email the people that own the individual address pay the fee for Email.  This is done by paying ISP fees or putting up with endless advertising on 'free' email systems.  All Email is the equivalent of 'postage due'.  Mass marketers using SPAM on the Internet can send 1 million messages with little to no cost for them.  This adds to the load on the Internet without doing one thing to help pay for the infrastructure.

The only reason SPAM is not destructive on a daily basis is that the vast majority of people on the Internet are courteous and ethical.  SPAMMING is done by the inconsiderate or unethical few.  If every person on the Internet sent a SPAM to everyone else on the internet only once in their lifetime, we would each get thousands of Emails every day.  This would destroy the usefulness of E-mail.

Spam the food, not related to Internet SPAM.  

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© 1995 Val Hubbard copyright details.

 Version 2.2

 Internet Rules last updated June 2, 2009.

This page last update July 6 2020

 These rules do not reference any specific person, company or software package. They are comical exaggerations of the occurrences of everyday life in the field of software. Any relation to events anywhere past, present or future is entirely coincidental.